Telepathic Judas ~ Chili's

A and B

Okay, I’m typing this in notes as not to spam you. But for this story you need to know two main characters: A and B. A is a 24 year old single mom who I had a date on Saturday with at chili’s. And Sunday I had a breakfast date planned with A. Now, I don’t go on a whole lot of dates, so I was really excited to go on two dates in one weekend. Now this A girl, she was a single mom and I knew that, she also had BPD, this i knew and I know how to work with BPD in a relationship. Now in any romantic situation, I’m always clear to say this speech about how I’m hesistant towards starting a relationship because I’m in so many bands and I’m in college and I work and I don’t want feelings to get hurt, often times this sentiment is reiterated multiple times in different ways, but often it gets ignored and I have to break things off that should be unofficial, which is really lonely and makes you feel more isolated and shitty than before. Anyway, with A, this exact thing happened. We had been talking a couple days and I didn’t really have any issues with that, but one day, I don’t respond to her for 2 hours because I was doing school and she texted me 2 hours later “are you still into this or what?” Which was really odd, since we had only been talking a couple days. I ended up telling her that it made me uncomfortable that me not texting her for 2 hours made her upset and she ended up replying with, “I’m sorry you introduced a vibe you couldn’t maintained.” Which is weird because as mentioned, we because only talked a couple days. This whole interaction with A happened on Friday, the next day, Saturday, I went to Chili’s to go out with B at 4:45 (the date was at 5). Well she hadn’t left her work yet, which she didn’t text me back till 4:55 saying this, well anyway she lived about 20 minutes away, give or take. To spare you the long story, she was 35 minutes late and I had ate my whole meal alone when she came. She ordered some kind of margarita when she got there, which made me a little uncomfortable because she drove herself but it was fine. She also mentioned off handlely she had been to jail three times, which I took as a joke, but when I laugh she stared into my soul and said “I’m being serious.” Anyone she ordered a salad, that never got put in as an order, so we ended up getting it for free. We were sitting perpendicular to some windows in a booth, so I had a pretty good view of who walked in the restaurant. All things consider, the date went alright besides going to jail and drunk driving escapades, until A showed up. She was with her big scary redneck family, who I had no clue about and she looked fucking mean as ever. Now luckily she didn’t see me, but I was petrified, and the feeling only intensified over the 20 minutes until we figured out B’s order was never put in and we got the bill paid and the free salad. As soon as I stood up, I felt daggers being shot my direction. I went outside and I was paranoid my tires were slashed or something. Anyway I walked B to her car, hugged her, and then as soon as I looked at my phone I saw a message that said, “if you had another girl, that’s all you had to say.” Which is honestly sad, and I felt horrible, but I told her that that’s why I had said that thing about not wanting anything and for a little more context, she had agreed with me on that, so I wasn’t sure what had changed. Anyways, I bolted out of chili’s and I ended up turning down some backroads to evade whatever nonexistent threat was there, when I was on the interstate for example, I was petrified of every broke down pick up truck I saw. I even ended up parking at a dollar general and sitting there for 15 minutes to make sure she didn’t follow me, as well as being so petrified from this one date that I fizzled this other situationship I had with a girl in New Mexico who legally gives crystal meth to mice. That story was essentially the same thing, and I felt bad because on one hand I hate having to break nonserious things off when someone else takes them too serious, and on another it makes me feel really shallow and lonely when it comes to that sort of stuff.

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